An announcement today indicating that Caroline Spelman was “minded” to introduce a ban on wild animals in Circuses has been greeted with outrage by Miss Elle Fant, General Secretary of the Union of Performing Wild Animals.
She trumped: “We are taking immediate Industrial Action in the face of these unfair redundancies and call on our comrades in other Unions to support us. All we are asking for is a fair crack of the whip. How can we expect these workers to survive in the face of these savage cuts when there are no support mechanisms to find them alternative employment or accommodation?”
Len T Lion roared: “These are cuts for the sake of it and are ideologically based. They are just pandering to the fat cat bankers who have already stolen our lunch. They should be behind bars. I’ve been in this business for 30 years and never had a day sick – now I’m being laid off. What other work can I get at my age and how are my cubs going to earn a living? I’m really wild now!”
A spokeswoman for Green Left said: “We must organise a Coalition of Resistance to support our unfortunate comrades and start a boycott immediately. We must recall this government and make them account for their actions. The Lions are prepared to negotiate in the Arena.”
Is this a Wildcat Strike?
ReplyDeleteI'm told the Camels have the Hump too!
ReplyDeleteThe sea lions reckon something fishy is going on and they're going to swallow it.
ReplyDeleteThings have taken a turn for the worse. The rest of the animals have rioted and armed gorillas have taken several ostriches...
ReplyDeleteI applaud Spelman and all involved, but I think the distinction between 'wild' and 'domesticated' is bogus.
ReplyDelete(Wanted to say that in a funny way, but experienced a sense of humour failure.)
Yes, the UDA, (Union of Domesticated Animals) think there is a sting in the tail. They are currently pawing over the details with UPWA and are determined to fight tooth and claw for their rights. They are trying to set up a trunk conference call with UFA (Union of Farm Animals) who think it's a chicken and egg situation but intend to milk it.
ReplyDeleteWe have just heard that the sheep are determined not to have the wool pulled over their eyes and the goats are cheesed off.
ReplyDeleteThe pigs have set up a Ham Radio station for the latest Mews.
ReplyDelete